Have you ever had one of those days where you feel like there’s no hope? Where you feel like you’ve messed up too much for God to make something out of your life?
Just a couple days ago I felt like this..
I had a rough day at work and felt completely incompetent.
Then when I got home and continued to work on my supporting documents for my grad school applications, I started to think, ”Who are you kidding?”
I spent the next two days, just trying to sleep my sadness away.I went out to shop for Christmas gifts and came home and slept. Went out to minister through dance and then I came home and slept again( I know horrible). But today on Christmas Eve I convinced myself that I must get up and face my reality.
I realized that my sadness came from being scared of disappointment. I was scared that if I placed my faith in God for this specific area of my life he would just disappoint me.I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to have a career that I would enjoy and that would support me financially.I actually cried just at the thought that maybe I would never have a master’s degree and disappoint those around me.
Later on today (December 24,2016)after I decided it was time to get it together , my sister and I started decorating our front door with Christmas decorations .I briefly went inside the apartment to get something and next thing I know I hear my sister speaking to a man. When I came back outside ,the man who was a Jehovah’s Witness, proceeded to ask me what my favorite gospel was and I randomly said Mathew.
He then asked me what my favorite scripture in Mathew was and the first one I thought of was Mathew 6:33.
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” –Mathew 6:33
Once Mathew 6:33 came out of my mouth, I sighed because I knew a long theological conversation was coming up next. In my mind I was like, “Giselle, why couldn’t you pick a scripture in Mathew about faith or of Jesus healing the sick? Loll”
He then asked me for MY definition of what I believe the kingdom of God is , and then he explained to me his interpretation of that scripture.
After our small little discussion he then began to speak to me about how real Christians don’t celebrate Christmas since we were decirating our door…
Although he basically said I wasn’t a real Christian, I believe God used that man to remind me of that scripture (Mathew 6:33).
I think God wanted to remind me to spend my life seeking his kingdom and his presence not just degrees, status and money.(There’s nothing wrong with education or money but it can’t be my only life goal)
“For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world , and loses his soul? Or what will a man gain in exchange for his soul.” Mathew 16:26
To remind me the importance of spending time seeking his word and seeking wisdom. to remind me that as we seek after him and cling to him, his voice will be so clear and we will know which way to go and which ideas are ours and which are his. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
And lastly, that as We seek after him and live for him he will always make sure that we have those things that we need in order to have the life that I was created for.(Psalms 37:25)
I wrote this for whoever is feeling hopeless; just remember that God has a plan for your life. He knew that you would be in the situations you are in now, that you would have the financial issue you have now and that you would have the desires that you currently have. And guess what .. he has a way out !
It’s really hard to trust God when our situations look impossible, but honestly the only option we have left sometimes is to have faith.
So as this year comes to a close and we come up with New Year resolutions and start to think about our 2017 plans , I would advise you to surrender your dreams and plans to God. To not hold on so tightly to your goals but allow God to have his way in your plans.
Allow God to be part of your life’s timeline. (You know the in 3 years I’ll have a degree, in 4 years I’ll start my business, in 5 years I’ll be married etc. etc.)
Remind yourself that even if things don’t go according to your plans they will always go according to his plans and his plans are perfect.
So lets try to stop holding on so tight to our lives and let God come in and have his way.
And remember there’s nothing evil about God, there’s nothing in him that wants to see you fail (its not in his nature) and he wont ever ever let you down.
So cheers for living lives of constant surrender and allowing God to be part of our life’s plans and timelines.
As I said I’m not perfect and don’t have it all figured out so pray for me and I will be praying for you.
For his glory,
Giselle A. Parris
Supporting scriptures:
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6
“But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.They will soar high on wings like eagles.They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31
The Apple of God’s Eye.. 